Sometimes life is very kind, allowing us to spread our wings and fly. We experience emotions of happiness, love, excitement, and satisfaction. We believe nothing is impossible to achieve and we are so ready to live life to the fullest.
But what happens when you don’t feel as excited as the day before? What goes through your head when after a serious of ‘bad days’ you are flooded with bad news, bad coincidences and bad luck? How do you hold on together?
I can’t help but begin to wonder what the new decade will bring for me. I am not going to lie, the last ten years weren’t the easiest but I think the hardest part of it was to learn how to let things go. My growing up stage took a little longer than expected to be honest, and probably I haven’t reached that exact level yet, but it’s fair to admit I have grown up in the last ten years a lot. Having said that, part of me still feel lost sometimes and wish for someone to guide me on how to go through life without having a little cry moment. And it’s normal to feel like this. A few days ago at Golden Globes, in an opening speech, Ricky Gervais said there is no sequel to our life. It’s so obvious and everyone knows that, but it’s so easy to forget this. His words reminded me of the importance of joy every day and how much we take things for granted these days. We think we will always have a job, food to eat, our parents and friends will always be around and whatever happens, we will always have another day to live. Hmm… I don’t think that’s true. I don’t think the next day is promised. In fact, it’s not. So it’s up to us what we make of today.
I mentioned above the hardest thing was for me to learn how to let things go. Sometimes when we feel overwhelmed we tend to hold on to things, people or situations. Sometimes you feel like it’s hard to let go of someone because, for example, you have known them for a very long time, and you feel attached. Other times you wake up in the morning feeling like you have tons of bricks on your shoulders and you realize you can’t take any more on. How to be strong then? How to stay calm and positive? How to let things go?
It took me a while to accept the fact, that if things cost you your peace, they are too expensive. What I have learned along with this too is that my own peace is priceless. I’ve finished the last decade crosschecking my own mistakes, lessons, values, and priorities and noticed I have burnt many bridges. Some were burnt out of anger, some by coincidence, others were my mindful choice. Do I regret any? Absolutely not. They all did teach me though that I don’t want to think of myself as the one who has low self-confidence. And I will not allow others anymore to take advantage of me and my precious time. In fact, it’s the complete opposite, I burned those bridges because I felt they needed to be burnt for my own good. They cannot hold me back and they cannot be the reason for my sleepless nights.
I cannot be a victim of my own expectations towards people or situations either. Actually, I can, but I don’t want to. Our life is not only a gift to us, but also to others. We have to know our worth, what we are capable of, what we bring to the table and how valuable we are, and if we feel uncomfortable around or about something, then why should we stress over this? I think it’s better to remove ourselves from that kind of relations, no matter hard it is, and be rewarded with a peaceful mind than to be stuck with a knife in our back.
When you feel overwhelmed with bad emotions and you feel you have no way out, the best thing is to crosscheck the situation and ask yourself if there is something physically you can do about it? Often there isn’t, and you just have to let it all go. It’s the least painful behavior – acceptance and ability to let it go. Focus on your good values and accept you deserve the happiness as much as others deserve it. And if that happiness requires to burn a bridge that is somehow toxic and making you feel uncomfortable in your own skin, then you shouldn’t feel upset or that you are missing out on something. You are not, believe me.
Tomorrow is not granted, not promised and not certain. Make yourself a priority every day and live life the way you want to live. Don’t hesitate in making decisions that are good for you. After all, we want our heads to be full of peace, not full of shit.
Mila