If someone would create a magic pill that will make all your worries away leaving you feeling happy every day, would you take it? Would you rely on something that promises you endless happiness regardless of the situation? Would you then be happy that you are happy? And what does it actually take for you to be joyful?
We are all going through very weird times at the moment. We have a pandemic of coronavirus, people who commit suicides due to depression & other mental health issues, individuals dying from cancer, in car accidents or from domestic abuse. We experience heartbreaks, disappointments, anger, sorrow, grief and all other sufferings that are often a very hard pill to swallow in one go. It makes me wonder how in all of this we can find the strength to be happy and what is the recipe for happiness?
I wish I knew the answer to that. I am still trying to figure the life out and so far I haven’t really succeded. I have recently lost to cancer someone very close to me, but I know I am not the only one who is in this position, especially now, with so many deaths reported globally. I guess as hard and painful as it is, we have to find a positive way to look at life. What actually matters to us?
I think over the last few years the entire population went slightly off the road with their priorities. Since social media came to our lives, we shifted our focus to the outside looks and materialistic things. It started to be trendy to go on expensive holidays and posting it on all social media channels to show we can afford it. We started working out at the gym so we can show off our bodies on Facebook and Instagram. We documented all our fancy outings to allow others to believe we live the perfect life. We all stopped doing things to make us happy & healthy, but to make others jealous. And we believed so deeply that the highest number of likes will make us happy, that we forgot why we are here in the first place.
Mental health issues are as dangerous as cancer or coronavirus. They all can kill within a matter of weeks or months. Can we prevent it? No. We don’t know when it’s our time to leave this world, and it’s not up to us to question it either. But finding the right balance in our existence, I think, is the key to happiness. What matters the most is our health, either the mental or physical side of it. Being grateful for still being here, and having food to eat – this should be your priority. You cannot feed your brain with likes. You cannot pay your bills with someone’s opinion. You cannot spend quality time with your children via smartphone. You cannot take to the grave your car or big TV screen. And you cannot, as recently we all have discovered pay for your health with money. You can be as rich as Bill Gates, or a famous influencer with thousands of likes, and still, end up in a hospital bed with no option to see your family and say goodbye.
My recipe for happiness is as simple as it can get – stay humble. Find a positive side in every situation you find yourself in. If you are alone and have nobody talk to – think of this time as a perfect opportunity to be comfortable with yourself. This will allow you to be confident and mentally strong with who you are as a person. If you are at home struggling with your children – think of this time as a great chance to spend time with them and teach them something new – grow their interest in cooking, cleaning, drawing, science, sports, etc. Show them something that will force them to be out of their comfort zone, but will be useful in their future. Give them a project to do, let them be creative without using the internet. Teach them how to write a CV. Or do an acting play where you are an employer and they are candidates applying for a job. Whatever it might be – think of a current quarantine as the precious time given to all of us to realize what matters the most. Remember, that those times will be over soon, and we will go back to the old ways. We will be busy again and we will, most likely, quickly forget about the current situation. So it’s important to be humble and grateful for what we still have – our health and family.
We will never avoid bad situations where we feel sad or overwhelmed, however, we can look at life as a precious gift given to us for free. So my advice is to take most of it and embrace your good values & qualities so you can live a peaceful life. Every one of us has a story to tell and every one of us is here on a journey, so create the best story for yourself using nothing but your inner happiness. Do what makes you happy. Look after your mental & physical health. Take care when choosing the food to eat. Smile more. Create beautiful memories with your loved ones. Think of yourself as the most amazing creature that walks on this earth and be grateful for being here. We will not get a second chance to live this life, so let’s just be happy with what we have.
In loving memory of W.
Mila